20 July, 2017

you don't know shit!

saturday morning at the local farmers' market. i immediately head to the welcome booth because 1. it is welcoming and 2. they serve free boozes (yes starting at 9, don't judge).

that day's booze was a hibiscus ice tea lemonade martini. it was delightful. as S, the lovely lady who co-runs the market, explained, it was a sort of boozy arnold palmer. we got to talking and one thing led to another and i ended up asking "who is arnold palmer?" just as a small texan woman walked up for her free drink.

when she heard those blasphemous words leave my mouth, she turned to me and scoffed, "you don't know who arnold palmer is???" there was little humour in her voice. this wasn't a joke. she was offended. S turned to the texan and laughingly explained that i was canadian. we had a chuckle about my cultural ignorance, and then, just to play up the whole canadian thing, i turned to small texan and said, "i apologize for not knowing who arnold palmer is," expecting her to respond lightheartedly. nope.

she finished her drink, tossed the cup into the bin, and said, "you've probably never heard of god, either!" and left. it took me a good several seconds to realise i'd just gotten dissed, not because i'm slow but because i tend to be wildly optimistic when it comes to my interactions with people IRL (less so online, for obvious reasons).

S and her boyfriend were just as shocked as i was. it was a triple whammy, sorta:
1. texans, even ignorant ones, tend to be friendly. this woman was NOT friendly.
2. did she see arnold palmer as god?
3. did she think canadians were all godless?
4. WTF?

i felt like shit for a full 5 minutes until i chatted with several other folk who were so wonderful that the nasty feeling in my tummy dissipated and i was back to loving humanity all over again!


Joan said...

That country is very celebrity driven, especially with sports. Who cares about a dead golfer!? You probably ran into another Trumpster.

Joan said...

Also, please hurry up and increase your penis size so that that Paul guy will stop selling his snake oil here and leave you alone!